A Merry Christmas Adam

I’ve been informed by a refutable source that the sentiment in the above title is becoming a very real thing. What is a Christmas “Adam?” People most certainly celebrate Christmas Eve— and since Christmas is a religious holiday. The scriptures hold Adam came before Eve biblically. So the night before Christmas Eve is starting to be known as Christmas Adam.

The Executive Editor REALLY celebrates Christmas. Accordingly as a family, we decided to celebrate our first Christmas Adam. Which entailed some last minute Christmas shopping, a family dinner out, and a trip to the local cinema.

Sounded like stress free and fun afternoon. We were going to go to a larger city to expand our commercial and culinary offerings. Then a funny thing happened. The fates decided to remind us that we have essentially chosen to live in Alaska. The skies opened and barrage of wet white stuff made its home on the ground.

Not a big deal. An accepted hazard of Northern Michigan living. Just adjusted accordingly. Didn’t want to be out late so the Executive Editor decided we should hit the retail wonderland known as the strip mall, a local chain restaurant, and catch an afternoon movie. She informed me that our showtimes were at 4:15 and 5:45. I thought to myself “wow they must be playing our chosen movie on two screens, that’s odd for our small town theater.” I had some “things” I wanted to do that night. In spite of that, I said let’s live dangerously, not rush things, and take the 5:45. We should still be home by eight.

We were off into the snow globe. Qdoba hit the spot and the local strip mall delivered only in the way a retail giant can. Then it was off to the show. Arriving slightly early for our 5:45 showtime. We quickly realized something. Our little four-plex was not showing the movie simultaneously on separate screens. The start time was actually at 6:45.

Now we have a problem. Our Christmas Adam has taken a turn. You see the Oakland Golden Grizzles are rarely on national television. They were playing a 8:30 nationally televised game against Nebraska from a Christmas tournament in Hawaii. I mean the life of a no paying sportswriter never really takes a night off.

My ever cheerful planner just shrugged and said we’ll find something to do. Your fearless narrator stared out into the Arctic abyss and pondered that statement. Before retorting with a curt “what exactly?” As the picture above shows we aren’t exactly on the Miracle Mile here.

My vision of cold winter night warmed by Greg Kampe dog cussing a referee with a Hawaiian shirt on were beginning to slip through my grasp. Have you really lived the Christmas experience until you’ve seen that? The matching Grinch sweaters with Tom Izzo were one thing. However this would be next level.

As I pondered the next move of the night. The Executive Editor and her protege were off. They can shop anywhere, it’s impressive. I was left with a 14 year old protege of my own giving me a blank stare in an empty and lifeless theater lobby. Christmas Adam was turning into a dud.

Then through the pale light and between ever increasing snowflakes, I saw it. A relic of the past were I spent countless hours as an adolescent. Not a popular pizza spot bustling with youthful activity. Nor a video arcade replete with competitive computer club adrenaline. Those have long since relocated both physically and digitally.

Pull up a chair while Uncle Johnny regales with tales of day long ago of this little place known as the— book store. You see kids, in case you can’t tell. I traffic in words. There was a time when information wasn’t readily available on your phone. You actually had to seek it out and hold onto your seats for this…. pay for it.

There was also a time when money was tight for your narrator. Wait, that hasn’t changed much. Books aren’t cheap, so if you were going to drop an Andrew Jackson on paperback you had preview it a bit to make sure it was good. This took time and effort. A trip to the bookstore was not a quick trip. Believe it or not, the establishments actually encouraged and facilitated this type of shopping. With comfortable chairs and soothing music. I enjoyed the process of selecting multiple books before gradually whittling down the selection and walking out with the the few I could afford. My “nerd card” has now been fully swiped.

I give you this background to set up both the familiar and comforting situation I had entering the bookstore on this night. I now had something that I think we can all agree we need more of. Time, and seemingly no place to be. Out of muscle memory I started to frantically scan the shelves. Perhaps I could find a book to buy for someone. But I had to do it qui….

Out of the corner of my eye I realized my son had grabbed a book and was sitting down to read it. I took a deep beath slowed the heart rate and pulled up a chair. He had selected a book on the history of the Detroit Lions. We began read and talk about Lions history. As bleak as that history might have been. I began to feel thankful. Thankful that as he approaches mid adolescence I have a son that actually listens to me (I think)

I was also thankful that I have two kids that are willing and seemingly enjoy spending time with their ever aging parents. At 16 and 14 this won’t last much longer. Or at least it will change with a new cast of characters and activities. They will have jobs and responsibilities that they will need to balance. As parents we will become parts of their complex equation.

I took about a half an hour to just to enjoy the stillness of that night. The seemingly empty downtown pictured above seemed aptly appropriate. It wasn’t the picturesque Hallmark movie scene that the Executive Editor loves. However it was perfect for what my frenzied and distracted brain needed at the time.

The night wasn’t done however. The aspirational scribe in me would love to end this piece with a life lesson handed by our chosen film of the night. That was not in the cards.

We spent nearly two hours watching a blue CGI video game character save the world from an evil Jim Carey. Actually two Jim Carey’s and I am still somewhat confused by that plot point. There was no Silent Night moment. Just an exploding mechanical crab that rose out of the River Thames. There was no dancing elves or Christmas Carols. There were “two” Jim Carey’s gyrating to Galvanize by the Chemical Brothers in form fitting red and black jumpsuits that I simply can’t unsee. If that doesn’t say Christmas for you then…..I’ll just let that lie.

Even though it wasn’t an Oscar winning tearjerker. I’m going to reach for a closing corollary. I played Sonic the Hedgehog growing up (quite poorly) My nostalgic brain pulled up a deep but seismic memory. This was the exact same theater that I watched good ole JC light his flatulence in the cinematic classic known as Dumb and Dumber in the year of our Lord 1994. As anyone between the ages of 40 and 50 can tell you. The world was never really the same after that moment.

The point being, time is a circular and fickle friend. When it’s on your side. It can be a rewarding and sentimental emotional supplement. When it’s not, you can slip into an aching or melancholy state. Becoming wistful for what was lost.

A few years ago as my daughter started high school. I delivered a tome about “not blinking” and enjoying every moment of these last few years. If you are parent you probably know the coda to that piece. I have blinked many times. It’s just the human condition. However there is a peculiar thing with time. Despite the wide held belief. Within a healthy and loving family, time can have a redemptive quality. I’ve witnessed fathers rebuild relationships with sons that were absent from growing up. I’ve witnessed people who struggled with addiction for most of their lives have a meaningful and sober second act. Time can heal all wounds.

So what to take from our first Christmas Adam? I take time. We intentionally made time as a family. If you have that luxury, do it while you can. If you do not, you can get creative. I don’t know, you can concoct a holiday as absurd as Christmas Adam and celebrate it accordingly. Whatever you do, enjoy your time this holiday season. It is a fleeting but rewarding shooting star in the constellation that is this life.